First of all, you should be relieved to hear that urges are completely normal. There is nothing wrong with you! You should also know that an urge is simply a thought/feeling. As with so many things about eating, that is both the good news and the bad news! It means that you are completely in control of what you choose to do with the thought, whether to act on it or not. It’s all happening inside of you. But what you tell yourself, inside your own head, will be the thing that makes the difference. Easy to say, hard to do. At least initially.

Briefly stated, you can either use a goal to help you further your aims or use it against yourself. And the fact that so many people use goals against themselves is the reason they hate setting goals in the first place. And it’s why they set small goals instead of shooting for what they really want.

As a coach, if I ask you, “What are the one or two behaviors that you do regularly that undermine your ability to weigh less?” (Pause reading this right now if you wish, get out some paper and answer that question.) Most people can answer it immediately. We know. We just don’t want to know what we know, right?

Now you’ve reclaimed the power. Start your diet focusing on these two behaviors. Leave everything else the same and see what happens. We’re using the scientific method. You’re looking for the “low-hanging fruit” as it’s called. For example, if you’re having two sugary drinks from Starbucks every day, try cutting back to one. Move gradually. But notice who holds the power now. It’s you! There is no one to rebel against. You’re likely to be more successful this way.